Jeff Naylor

Another piece of my childhood is gone

RIP, Ed McMahon.

An open note to the next person who cuts my hair

I understand that I have a tendency to speak somewhat cryptically at times, I like to speak in code words and phrases that might be a little difficult to interpret at times.  In order to alleviate any unfortunate future misunderstandings, let’s break the code on a few of them now.

When I say, “I like my length, I’ve been growing it for four months, I haven’t had long hair for 20 years, I just need a bit of the volume taken out on top and in back and trimmed up a bit,” this does NOT mean, “Chop off all my fucking hair, especially in back, get it up over my collar and ears.”

Now I realize that I left a lot of room for interpretation there.  “I want my hair left long,” could mean a lot of different things.  That’s awfully grey language, terribly nebulous.  I can see how that could be misinterpreted as “Do a hatchet job on my head, disregard any fleeting thoughts you might have had about doing as I requested.”  I mean, I’m not unreasonable here, I fully admit that, “I’ve been growing it since February,” could be easily sound to the casual listener as if I’d appended, “and it’s about time you cut all that shit off.”

But that’s really not what I meant, even though it’s clearly what was heard.

So, to the next person who cuts my hair (and you can expect to see me in, oh, late September or so), here are a few key phrases for you to jot down.

When I say, “I’ve been growing my hair for four months, I want to keep the length,” that means, “If you cut off all my hair, I’m going to chop off your fucking hands and make you eat them.”

When I say, “I haven’t had long hair for twenty years,” this means, “If you cause me today to NOT have long hair, I am going to take those scissors from you and stab you in the neck, giggling manically as the life force oozes from your lifeless body.”

Look, I’m not a violent man by nature.  I’m just asking that you try to understand gibberish phrases like, “I want my hair long,” when I use them.  I want you to work with me, and try to come to a mutual understanding that pleases us both.

Thanks, and I’ll see you in four months.  Whoever you are.

Best regards,
Jeff

F1 is done.

Herr Maxxx just had his bluff called.

The Formula One Teams’ Association announced on Thursday night that it is setting up a breakaway championship.

Following a four hour meeting at Renault’s Enstone factory, the eight members of FOTA – Ferrari, McLaren, Renault, BMW Sauber, Toyota, Brawn, Red Bull Racing and Scuderia Toro Rosso – said they had grown frustrated with the FIA’s stance against the organisation, and had no option but to create a series of their own.

Good job, Max, you moron.  Have fun selling tickets to Williams vs. Force India and a bunch of GP2 and F3 teams.  Hopefully someone has already called David Richards and let him know there’s room on the REAL F1 grid for Prodrive.

FOTA has already contacted the group that manages MotoGP to run their new series, so it’s not as if they’ll be operated by amateurs.

Hey, MotoGP races in Indianapolis, doesn’t it?

Attention South Bend

Pat "Boss Hogg" Bauer

Come on.

Seriously?

Scenes from Royal Ascot

iPhone 3 software supposed to hit at 1:00PM EDT

According to The Unofficial Apple Weblog, the iPhone v3 software should start showing up in iTunes at 1:00.

No clue whether that also includes the $10 upgrade for us iPod touch users, but I guess we’ll find out in about three hours.  There’s not a lot in there for the touch that interests me except for a horizontal keyboard in Mail.  Finally.

EDIT:

There’s not a lot earth-shattering in v3, but it was worth $10 just to finally get horizontal e-mail.  WTF were they thinking?

Now if Apple would just announce whether they’re actually coming out with a tablet or not so I’d know whether to go ahead and pick up a Kindle…

Spectators

Alden Spectators

The mailman brought me greetings from Honolulu this morning.

Spectator: A shoe design that is characterized by 2 materials, often of different colors or materials, with an edge of the dominant color having a pinking edge exposed, and a perforated design on the toe.

My friend Tom Park from Leather Soul in Hawaii took orders back in August of last year for a special run of Alden spectators.  Spectators are generally considered a summer shoe and typically will have brown, black or even navy as the predominant color with a white body, or occasionally a tan linen or canvas insert.  While that brown and white is very traditional, and as much as I like them, it’s not a look that is frequently seen in Indiana and isn’t the most versatile shoe you can own.  To be sure, these aren’t going to be the most versatile pieces in my wardrobe anyway, but the suede will make this a shoe I can wear into the fall as well as in the summer, even on dry days in the winter.

I’m planning to wear them primarily with seersucker this summer and with tweeds in the fall and winter months.  Perhaps someday I’ll gain the requisite courage to wear a brown and white spectator.  Until that day comes I have this somewhat more subtle variation and I think they’ll perform admirably.

Highly Recommended

Tam Dao

Everyone knows I’m a clothing freak, less well known is that I’m a cologne aficionado as well.

I’ve been a great fan of sandalwood as a fragrance for a long time.  It was a great day in my life when I found The Art of Shaving’s sandalwood shaving cream, I love the stuff.  It’s a soft, subtle scent that is strangely calming.  For a long time I’ve been looking for a cologne that has the same effect.  Art of Shaving has a sandalwood cologne too, but there’s something just a bit off about it.

This is Tam Dao by Diptyque.  It is brilliant.

It is a fairly linear fragrance, which is to say that it doesn’t develop over time the way many fragrances do, but that’s OK.  It’s also not the longest lasting fragrance in my wardrobe, and it has a very light sillage, which means that you have to get fairly close to me to smell it.  Which is also OK, I think that’s how most fragrances should work in most circumstances, I don’t want people to smell me coming from a mile away.

When someone does get close enough to me to smell me, I don’t mind smelling like Tam Dao, however.  It’s light and creamy, smooth and calming.  If you like sandalwood, and I can’t imagine anyone not liking it, you could do a lot worse than to give Tam Dao a try.  Next up, I’m giving Profumum Santalum a shot.

Prince Charles at Ascot

Since Ascot comes up in just a week, here are a couple of pictures of Prince Charles from last year.  Charles is considered one of the world’s best dressed men, and appropriately so.  I like his somewhat nontraditional choices, the light gray morning suit is brilliant, and the white striped blue shirt looks great with it.

Ah well.

If you won every year you wouldn’t appreciate it as much.

And I’ve still watched my team lift the Cup a lot more than you’ve watched your team lift it.

I blame Hossa.  If you’re going to come to Detroit to win a Cup, the least you could do is play like it.  Dude was transparent through the whole series, I don’t think I heard his name called once except to ask where he was.

This will make for a long ride home tonight.